I'm not sure I can write about this.
The ache in my heart is so great and the depth of my shock and emotional fatigue have left me feeling like I'm living in a dream. Please forgive us for not writing the emails for Mission:Launch we had promised. We have been in the midst of a battle since this seven week period began.
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| Christmas morning in Cambodia |
It all began on a wonderful Christmas morning. It was the best yet, just our family laughing and playing together. Just as I put the sourdough biscuits in the oven, our sweet grandmother from down the street (
Rady's grandmother), brought our produce from the market. I asked how Rady was feeling, and she said she was having a little bleeding and was worried. I went down the road to see her, fear so evident on her face. She had gone to a clinic the night before where they had preformed an ultrasound. They told her the baby was dead and that she had a large tumor pushing on her uterus. The tumor was very visible on the ultrasound but so was the "sac" for the baby. After examining her and asking questions, I felt we should get a second opinion, so I dropped my dear family off at a friend's Christmas party, and Rady, her mother, and I went to a nearby clinic. The doctor confirmed what the other clinic had said after viewing the ultrasound and then referred us to a clinic where they could clean out Rady's uterus and decide how to proceed about the tumor.
Rady was heartbroken. In all honesty, so was I.
Wasn't this the baby we had prayed for? Wasn't this the child who God would use to convince them all of His power over life and death?
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| Rady's Grandmother and younger sister |
At the next clinic, we had to wait for some time for the doctor to return. We spoke with several in the waiting room, my heart breaking as Rady told of her miscarriage with a look of anguish in her eyes. It was then that I decided, even though my faith was so weak, I should keep praying. I'm ashamed to say, however, that I resisted the Lord in telling Rady that God would save her baby. We went into the ultrasound and the doctor told us there was no problem. No tumor. No miscarriage. He prescribed progesterone for the bleeding, then sent us home.
The two ultrasounds were completely different!
"Why are they different?" Rady asked me on the way home, and I knew I could be silent no more.
"I believe God healed you to show Himself to you." I told her.
And, indeed, He had. He had shown Himself to both of us, Rady's family, and the girls in the waiting room.
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| Melanie after the Christmas Movie Party |
That night, we had over 50 people in our home eating and watching the story of Christmas in Khmer on a borrowed screen with a borrowed projector. After such a long day, we were exhausted. Everything imaginable went wrong: The sound was no good, we ran out of food (at least they liked my cooking!), the first movie was boring to city folk who watch TV all the time, our Christmas candy was stolen, no one stayed through the second movie, and Rady's mom felt so indebted to us that she did all the dishes. We went to bed tired and discouraged.
The next day we received word of
Tawn's accident. He died that afternoon.
I first met Tawn when I came in 2003. I spoke often with a certain young woman about him. She later became his wife. They have served faithfully for many years.
We have been going to the funeral for the past two days. It was a blessing to see so many, some who were on less than friendly terms, come together. As we walked behind the funeral cart singing hymns through our neighborhood, even passing by some of our non-Christian neighbors, I wondered if God would use this tragedy for His good.
Doesn't he work all things together for good?
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| Tawn in 2003 |
Walking back from the funeral that first evening, we stopped in the dark to speak with some neighbors. Rady's family has accused their of causing a moto accident that injured Rady last month. They are quite angry at each other. We encouraged them to forgive. They laughed. I know they think we're crazy.
The next day, grandmother told us Rady was not doing well. They had sent for me, but we had been at the funeral. When I arrived, Rady told me she had some more bleeding. She had gone to a clinic where, despite the little amount of blood and not doing a new ultrasound, they proceeded to clean out her uterus.
Rady had not had enough bleeding to confirm a miscarriage and had not passed any tissue. She was not ill nor was she in pain. I am convinced she had not had a miscarriage.
I was so sickened after my visit with Rady. How strong are the forces of evil in this country! Whether the doctor at the clinic was driven by greed (the procedure cost $40 - two months wages) or ignorance or whether Satan used another motivation, we'll never know. Please pray for this family, that God will be revealed in another way. We KNOW God is more powerful than any evil force, but we also know how our dear Khmer friends choose to follow Satan's lies, choose to be in his bondage.
The next day, we received a call that a dear Christian friend of ours was considering leaving his wife. Satan is working here, and he does not want to release his hold on the people. Pray fervently for freedom for our friends! Pray also for us that the Holy Spirit will give us wisdom, discernment, peace, and perseverance. Pray that God will sustain our hearts that feel like breaking over the work of the prince of darkness. We rejoice evermore knowing how beautiful and wonderful the Light is in the face of such darkness.
Isaiah 9:2
When we moved to the village, we shed many tears over leaving Theavy. She had become a part of our family, and we will always think of her as such. We carry her love in our hearts, and it spills out of my children to our new neighbors, sprouting friendships across cultures. When God showed a young Khmer woman from the beaches of Cambodia His love, I am sure she never dreamed she would transform the lives of an American family with six kids. But He did.
Palm 
